Today, I am a Human BE-ing

Last night, I realized that so much that has been bothering me has to do with the fact that I have been neglecting the things that nourish me. I have been trying to hand out cups of water from a well that has been drying up. I have been handing out less-than-exemplary water, and I have been exhausted from it.

Today, I am just trying to BE Sarah Marie (Lauterback) Koller. I am just trying to listen to what God wants, what is important to Him, and I am trying to pay less attention to what I believe will make me FEEL important.

I write lists every day. To get things done, to stay focused, to stay on top of things. And list are good; they are useful. But sometimes- sometimes, to be quite honest- I want to write my lists and check everything off so that later I can look back and read that I really did something worthwhile. It may be that I am a little too caught up in living life to the fullest, to make my life "count." Those are admirable goals, to be sure, but there are times that I get so caught up in the logistics of living a full life that I fail to do the very thing I was striving for.
How tricky.

So today, I will just be. I will write lists of what I believe to be important, but I will allow them to be secondary to the things that are important to God and the unforeseen circumstances that are a better plan than I would have chosen for myself.